A Major Life Event

Earlier this month, a personal relationship issue was finally resolved. There had been a few major compatibility issues with my long term significant other. After several months of consideration, we amicably decided to part ways.

This was a milestone for both of us. Karl had never been in a long term relationship until he met me. I had never initiated a breakup. I had always, previously been the one who was dumped. Initiating the split was a humbling, scary thing to do. I nearly chickened out.

I mention this here as a heads-up in case the direction of this blog makes a slight shift in direction. It may or might not. After all, the main thrust of bluejayblog has been to share my personal observations about things and topics I encounter and find interesting. Relationship breakups can be interesting. (I have no intentions of sharing intimate, personal information of my now ex-BF nor me.) 

Perhaps a few future posts will be colored by my status as unattached–once again single. There will be no LGBT exclusive-interest posts but those that do mention the community may have a slightly different take. There will not be any uncomfortable, personal topics–any mentions, if any, will be fairly mundane.

Suffice it to say that Karl (not his actual name) is a very closeted man while I am quite open and candid about my sexual orientation having been somewhat of an activist for decades. This wide difference is part of the reason for our friendly parting. There were no issues of abuse, violence, cheating, nor major dysfunction. We parted mainly due to having incompatible personalities. We simply grew in different directions. Both of us gave our best. We were partners for almost 14 years despite our 14 years age difference. I’m the older one.

Anyhow, our last conversation took less than half-an-hour. We were cordial to each other and we were much more calm than I had expected, too. We made a gentlemen’s agreement to completely severe ties and to not intrude into one another’s lives. Frankly, I’m rather shocked at how smoothly the breakup happened.

No, I’m not on the market again, yet. I don’t do rebound relationships very well. The next stretch of time will consist of private contemplation and analysis of the past 14 years of Karl and I together. I want to be single for awhile, so as to explore that point of view again.

Again, this post is just a heads up to help you understand if or when a slight adjustment of focus takes place on this personal blog. Thanks for reading and understanding.

The Blue Jay of Happiness quotes neuroscientist and author, Abhijit Naskar. “In the unification of two minds, orientation of sexuality is irrelevant.”

About swabby429

An eclectic guy who likes to observe the world around him and comment about those observations.
This entry was posted in Friendship, Hometown and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to A Major Life Event

  1. Yernasia Quorelios says:

    💜 Fully Understood; when I Married 20 years ago SHE!!! was So Excited…for HER!!! Own Reasons (SHE!!! showed Me The Pros and Cons List) Our Add Association Was OVER!!!…as a Bitter, Twisted Divorcee who Will ReMarry Only One Certain Lady, I KNOW!!! The BBG (Big Brave Girl) Will Turn Up and I KNOW!!! who SHE!!! is with HER!!! Crisp List of Pros and Cons; it’s Crystal Clear Clarity that SHE!!! wants a Relationship with HER!!! Heart NOT!!! HER!!! Head, I Will Wait ForEver so should YOU!!! ALL


  2. Reading your post I can sense you are strong enough to handle things. Just keep doing that.

  3. Jeff Flesch says:

    Ah, totally understand, Jay. I am now single for the first time in over 20 years….meditation and breathing, as you write in your above response, are also two of my go-to’s. I love how you write about taking this time to contemplate…I agree with that, and am doing the same. Be well, my friend.

  4. bloom|time says:

    I am so glad your parting was amicable and I wish you all kinds of happiness as you move forward.

  5. rkrontheroad says:

    A very mature breakup on both of your parts. Remember the good times and try not to have any regrets. I wish you well in your single life ahead.

  6. I’m sorry. This sounds like such a mature, amicable, cordial, and necessary parting, and yet, ending relationships is never easy. Wishing you strength and happiness

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.