Today we celebrate and contemplate our fathers. This is also true even if he is no longer alive. Fathers and other men who filled a parental role greatly influenced our behavior and attitudes. Many people were fortunate to have reasonably happy childhoods due in large part to their fathers; while other people suffered through painful childhoods because of their fathers. Regardless of our experiences, Fathers Day shines a spotlight upon our father figures.
In hindsight, one of the gifts my own father unintentionally gave me was witnessing how he bore adversity. As a family, we had plenty of ups and downs due to his struggles with anger. This led to some challenging periods in life. We learned to be patient and cautious during stormy times. We found gratitude during his happier moments.
He was in his twenties when he began having our family. He had just served his stint in the U.S. Army and had to buckle down with adult responsibilities soon afterwards. His intent was to be a better father than his own. In many ways, he succeeded. At least he earned an “E” for effort as he grew into his role as head of the family.
Dad later made an effort to make up for some of his shortcomings. He sought help from professionals and followed their advice. He improved more during his second marriage because step-mom had healthy boundaries and refused to “put up with his nonsense”.
Towards the end of his life, dad said that in spite of the family’s ups and downs that he believed in my ability to weather adversity and to become the best version of myself. It was good to hear that later in life rather than never.
I hope you have a contemplative, meaningful Fathers Day.
Ciao
The Blue Jay of Happiness quotes William Shakespeare. “It is a wise father that knows his own child.”
bluejayblog 
In honor of the memories they’ve left behind.
I don’t know if this is true, but I’d guess that 65% or more of fathers do at least a pretty good job of being fathers.
Considering there’s a lot of DYI, on the job training, that’s a fairly good percentage.