Honest Dealings

When we clear our minds of wishful thinking and Utopian beliefs about the world as best as we can, we notice that human nature is rather dark, selfish, and dishonest. Yet despite these troubling traits, a certain grace and beauty coexists within the human species. This flowering and drive of the human spirit against entropy are fueled by honesty.

First and foremost, is honesty regarding oneself and one’s dealings with others. For the moment, I’ll set aside the presence of dishonesty of others so as to not become self-righteous with finger pointing. On the other hand, personal honesty is a quality to cultivate and practice. Honesty is at the heart of trust. If we’re honest with ourselves and with others, our integrity becomes a building block of solid character.

Although these statements are basic and obvious, personal honesty with oneself is easy to neglect. One can deny having certain toxic traits and pretend to be forthright in dealings with oneself. Knowing our true limitations and strengths enables us to trust ourselves. Generally speaking, uncertainty and lack of confidence spring from dishonesty about oneself.

Regarding our basic, interpersonal relationships with significant others, we know that love requires a touch of physical chemistry, romance, commitment, trust, and compassionate honesty. Variations of these ingredients are present in relationships with family and close friends with trustworthiness and honesty being utmost. The absence of these qualities makes betrayal and infamy easier. Honesty in league with personal trust enable one to work wonders in interpersonal relationships and life in general.

There is something unnerving about people who proclaim their honesty as part of an inducement to garner public trust. Many politicians and con-artists boast about their honesty to tiresome degrees in their attempts to woo us into buying into their agendas. In many cases, the confidence artists use our own prejudices and dishonesty as tools so we willingly work against our own interests. This is a timeless, efficient technique that has propelled many questionable individuals into positions of great wealth and power.

Regarding new acquaintances, when an unfamiliar person arrives into our presence, we have first impressions–that is we “judge the book by its cover”. We anticipate her possible attributes and faults. We place them in a sort of “parking orbit” among other acquaintances. As we discover more about the new acqaintance we eventually learn whether or not to trust her due to the presence or absence of honesty. This social identity is an aid in judging if she should remain in the “parking orbit” or come down to base as a friend.

As basic componants of a good life, balance, courage, a life’s philosophy, and honesty are essential. Anyone who wishes to live a satisfying, effective life is wise to include these attributes as integral within themselves. Perhaps the stronest of these is to practice honest dealings with oneself and others.

Namaste

The Blue Jay of Happiness quotes the sixth President of the United States, John Quincy Adams. “All men profess honesty as long as they can. To believe all men honest would be folly. To believe none so is something worse.”